Harold Camping is an Ass

Confused Harold, sitting in his office and wondering when the next doomsday will be. Soon, Harold? We're dying to know!

That may sound a little harsh, but I've been kind of keeping track of and researching this Harold Camping, and I am terribly annoyed by him. I realize this has nothing to do with the senses or dreams or whatever crap I talk about, but I needed to make this fact public: Harold Camping is a pathetic, crazy old fool with nothing better to do than make apocalyptic predictions and trick gullible people into giving up their jobs and lives for this meaningless cause. Harold, what's up with that?
You were wrong, my friend. Although some say he has 11 more days after the prediction to maybe still be correct. Good luck with conjuring up a doomsday by that time.
And I'm officially declaring that May 21st shall forever be a world holiday: "Harold Camping is an Ass Day"
It'll be great. We can sell shirts and buttons and really make this whole thing fun for everyone. Harold, you're invited. There should be some tents set up in his disgraceful name.
I could go on about how crazy this whole thing is, but that's not necessary. I'll leave it at this and save up my dried food in my nuclear shelter for the real apocalypse: December 21st, 2012. How could that not be it? It's got so many 1s and 2s! (12-21-12)
Mayans are (probably) my people anyway.

Part 2 of the Quest for Lucid Dreaming

This is like dreaming, right?

To begin, I should just articulate that I don't know if anybody cares about this quest into lucid dreaming of mine. I certainly think it's interesting, and that should be enough to write about it, but perhaps it would be all the same if it were my journal where basically only I read them. It's funny to think that nobody may read this very sentence about nobody reading this sentence.

But moving on to the topic at hand, lucid dreaming, I am updating this blog to inform the world (nobody) that I have still not have achieved lucidity. In other words, I'm still not an oneironaut (like an astronaut of my dreams!). Great. So then why update if nothing has happened? Well, I don't really know. There are a few things I wanted to express.

First of all, I have been dreaming pretty vividly lately, and I would perhaps partially attribute that to thinking about dreaming (more specifically, lucid dreaming) every night before I go to bed. I would more so say that thinking about the dream as soon as I wake up makes it more vivid, which brings up an interesting question: are vivid dreams vivid if you don't remember them? It makes me wonder about the nature of dreams. Is their vividness dependent on how well remember them, or vice versa? Pretty interesting thought, right? Are some dreams just by their own nature more vivid than others? I don't know. Certainly I remember dreams better if I think about them right away upon awakening, but does that make it more vivid? I suppose I'd like to think that the vividness of dreams is dependent on my memory, and if I just developed good dream memory (which I'll discuss) then all of my dreams would be quite vivid and clear, to the point where it's as real as a memory in the physical realm. Memories are all we take from experiences. Imagine the rich experiences you'd have in your memory if you could just lucid dream vividly! And here's another question: are lucid dreams more vivid because you're aware in them? Or is it because - I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's move on to dream memory.

I'll have some of what he's smoking.

Dream Memory

This is an important part of lucid dreaming, although those who have read "The Power of Now" may disagree and say that just having the experience was enough, and you don't need to remember it for it to be a good thing. I have trouble accepting that. I hold on to memories so closely that it's hard to imagine a life without long-term memory. Not remembering yesterday? Too much. I seem to digress. Let's assume that lucid dreams are worthless without the memory (for me they are as of now, since sharing the experience with others is also fulfilling). Now, I'm no oneirologist, nor to I know much about wine, but here are some things I've learned about dream memory:

1. Waking up in the middle of a dream (REM state) makes the dream quite memorable and vivid (interchangeable?). This is textbook information, and I've experienced this myself (sorry if this sounds like a REMedial psychology class). How do you wake up in your REM state? Well if you're lucid dreaming then waking yourself up in your dream is sure to make that dream quite lucid, or at least I assume it will. There, now I've caught up with myself. You could even REModel your dream house! Another way to wake yourself up is to put a stone in your hand and set your hand in a position so that dropping the stone will fall out of your hand and bed, and then onto the ground. There are a couple of problems I anticipate with this method: REM is the deepest part of your sleep (in one sense), but does that mean that you won't drop the stone before you reach REM? I don't think it would work very well. The most plausible way is to find your friend who cares more about you having vivid dreams than sleeping well. Tell him to look at your eyelids while you sleep, and to wake you up when he notices your eyeballs going crazy. Well, a little after he notices. You have to dream a little, right? So good luck with that one. Your dreams are sure to be REMarkable. Actually, recently I had a dream that I recall as quite vivid, in which I was flying on a tiny plane with a disproportionately large bathroom. The stewardess entered the bathroom and was clearly trying to seduce me. I started getting lightheaded and excited. I asked for some orange juice to cure the lightheadedness, and she walked very close to me. I grazed her body and felt her. It was so real, and in all my excitement I found myself staring at my dark ceiling in my room, awake and breathing rapidly. But I wasn't controlling it! Which brings me to the next point:
2. Another REMedy to better REMember your dreams is to talk or write about it ASAYA (As Soon As You Awaken) (and I'm sure that acronym will not save any time) (just look at all these explanations) (and you'll know pretty soon) (that the acronym took way more time than simply writing out the words "ASAYA"). This is proven to help (if you don't want to listen to the whole thing, they get very relevant when there are 7 minutes left (in regards to the first method of dreamemberance)). I keep a dream journal/sketch book to write all my dreams down and sketch stuff. The sooner the better, even if it may not seem like that. So I'm saying the instant you wake up start writing or talking. It helps (me at least) to talk to someone or a recording device to seem less like an insane person. I call it REM-iniscing. And hopefully there will be a larger REMainder of your dream instead of small dream shard REManence. REMbrandt would be proud. And I am not one bit REMorseful for the pun crimes I've committed on humanity. Thankfully, I'll probably be at a REMote location when you (nobody) are (is) reading this. Alright, I'm done.

This is all I have to say for now. But there is much more to be said. I'm still greatly anticipating a night of beautiful lucidity, and it could even happen tonight, but it probably won't happen until the summer when I'm much less stressed by schoolwork and the like. This is NathaN, signing off. Goodnight.